“I am doubting myself. I find it hard to see worth as a lover.”“Oh, Ashley! Oak Leaf will embrace you and bring healing when this is done.”“... wonder whether I can find healing at Oak Leaf.” As doubt had grown, my confidence as a noble decreased. I feared I would see shadows of Stone and Lucinda every time I contemplated accepting vulnerability rather than a noble’s poise. Yet I could not be myself without that vulnerability.I didn’t want to dwell too deeply on the future. Doubt is dangerous for. Katy comes and I get her loaded in the car, when Katy says, “that girl is nothing but trouble.”I look at her and ask, “why do you say that.”“I can just tell,” she says.Saturday afternoon, I’m in my music room when I hear Mom say that I have a visitor. a minute later I see Carl walk in. We shake hands and do the half hug. He sits down and tells me that Sam gave him the itinerary for the gigs we’re doing on Christmas break and he is working on transportation for the band, crew, and equipment. I. .. plod ... plod ... day in, day out. Get up ... yup, same guy looking back in the mirror ... shave the face, flush, shower. Dress ... maybe it's shirt and tie ... or maybe it's mechanics overhauls ... regardless ... you're one of the faceless millions preparing for the daily grind."Come get it before I slop it to the hogs!" comes the cry from the kitchen. The thundering herd is heard on the stairs or the hall. There is always the, "She did it." "Did not." "Did too." "Shut up and eat, you'll. I'm onto a story that I think might be interesting." Yes, Ma'am."The traffic down Fifth Avenue was horrendous as usual, so she took her cell phone out of her purse and placed a call."Hi honey, I missed the sports report, how'd you do?"... "Well, congratulations, dear. That's three games in a row. You're going to win the Stanley Cup this year. I just know it!"... "Me? Oh, I'm just off to scope out a story about that kinky sex club I told you about."... "Yeah, Murray finally gave me the story!.
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If the divorce papers are ready you could leave her for us."I intervened, "I'm very curious about this."She smiled at me and said, "I hoped you would
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